Case in point: my morning routine.
I would LIKE to wake naturally, feeling bright and refreshed after a night of uninterrupted sleep, and do an hour of uninterrupted yoga followed by a simple breakfast, a quick read of the paper and then an hour of coffee and writing — again, uninterrupted.
The problem, of course, is that I haven’t done anything uninterrupted since 1996. The very day I brought my children home from the hospital, I learned that there was no “I” in “pee” — nor was there one in “sleep,” “shower,” “eat,” “cook,” “read” or “personal space.” And though there were, in fact, “I”s in “think,” “write” and “drive,” it became immediately apparent that they no longer applied to “me.”
Of course, I was certain that it was just a phase, one that would last a few years, tops, at which point I would go right back to setting my own sleep and hygiene schedules. But fast forward to 2008, and I’m still getting knocks on the bathroom door, skipping showers to get the boys to activities on time and responding to occasional unsolicited wake-up calls in the middle of the night.
What’s more, my children, when they awaken in the morning, like to crawl into bed with me for a while and cuddle, which — though I find it sweet, endearing and enjoyable — stands squarely between me and my ideal morning routine.
But my children aren’t the only wrenches in the works. Even if by some miracle neither they nor the cat nor my bladder wake me in the night, my husband’s alarm is set to begin beeping at 5 am sharp, and I am NOT, by nature, a 5 am sharp kind of gal. Six am, perhaps. Seven am, fine. But five o’clock? That’s just cruel. Especially in the dead of winter when sunrise is still nearly three hours away.
So, my ideal morning, which I am certain would make me productive all day long and satisfied beyond compare — in addition to providing a fair measure of balance to my life — is a long way from becoming a reality. Or at least it was — until a few weeks ago when I finally found a workable compromise.
Now, when my husband’s alarm starts chirping, as much as I want to put the pillow over my head and go back to sleep, I pry my eyes open, peel myself out of the unbearably cozy bed and stumble my way downstairs to the yoga room. There, I do an hour of yoga (uninterrupted!), which I follow with a simple breakfast, a quick scan of the front page of the paper and as much writing as I can fit in before my children wake up, which is usually around seven. When I hear their footfalls on the floor above, I grab a book and head back upstairs for cuddle time, which I am infinitely glad I have not had to give up.
I love morning cuddles, and I’m finding that I love them even more now that I’m getting some time for myself in the morning, too. Because life IS about balance, and while Mick Jagger was right when he penned, “You can’t always get what you want,” he made the song positively profound when he added, “but if you try some time, you just might find, you get what you need.”
Belinda Ray is a homeschooling mother and freelance writer who finds time to write when her children and their friends have lightsaber battles in the yoga room (but only if the laundry is already folded and everyone’s been fed).